|Get to know yourself a little be better every week! If you are here for the first time and wonder what its all about, you can find out here. You can follow the exercises of being a blob, meeting your future self in a dream, considered your role models, meta programmes! This week we are talking values. Its the real deal.|
Week 6 – Your values are what matters most
What are values?
This Week we are thinking about Values. These are concepts that can guide our behaviour. Words like trust, honesty, or fun or others like caution, patience or seriousness all describe values and things that might matter more or less to different people.
In the British comic gangster movie Snatch, a trail of dead bodies litters the screen. For Vinny – the hardened gangster – killing the dog that’s swallowed the diamond they need is a step too far! In other words, his values won’t allow it.
Things get tricky when we try to interpret these words. No assumptions can be made about what people mean when they use them. So, even if we both agree that fun is good, your idea of fun might be very different from mine. And yet, even with this ambiguity, exploring our values is very useful in getting to know ourselves better.
Values are at the heart of many a misunderstandings, conflict, anger and hurt. They are also central to building relationships, the basis for reconciliation and understanding.
So what are yours?
This 5 step exercise is a start to exploring our values and reflecting what it might mean in the workplace or at home. BEWARE! Most of us lie to ourselves when doing this exercise! We get caught up with what we think we should feel rather than what we do. Try to avoid this – and enjoy noticing it when you do!
The list in the table below contains a jumble of many words commonly used to describe values. As you run down or across the list, choose and write down every one that is truly important as a value to you. Do not overthink your selections and spend long on it. You may think they are all important but this exercise is to pull out your 20 or so top list.
As you read through the list, simply write down the words that feel like a core value to you personally. If you think of a value you possess that is not on the list, be sure to write it down as well. You may have quite a long list!
|Benevolence; Power; Abundance; Ethics; Commitment; Enthusiasm; Calmness
Passion; Independence; Generosity; Joy; Individuality; Preparedness; Dedication
Punctuality; Consistency; Self-Control; Zeal; Caring; Versatility; Trustworthiness Mindfulness; Service; Quality; Uniqueness; Security; Friendships; Inclusiveness
Responsiveness; Appreciation; Intuition; Achievement; Cooperation; Fun; Empathy; Inspiration; Autonomy; Resourcefulness; Credibility; Safety; Individuality; Proactive; Carefulness; Thoughtfulness; Professionalism; Teamwork Reliability; Daring; Fairness; Security; Well-Being; Curiosity; Understanding Dependability; Perfection; Challenge; Stability; Expressiveness; Contribution; Charity; Open-Mindedness; Popularity; Family; Creativity; Happiness; Development; Kindness; Cheerfulness; Balance; Compassion; Traditionalism;Grace; Peace; Warmth; Stability; Playfulness; Love; Freedom; Knowledge; Honesty; Attractiveness; Resilience; Spirituality Encouragement; Success; Optimism; Diversity; Advancement; Wisdom
Advocacy; Performance; Adventure; Boldness; Leadership; Cleverness; Learning Recognition; Innovation; Risk-taking; Healthy; Usefulness; Acceptance; Responsibility; Decisiveness; Collaboration; Simplicity; Selflessness; Humility; Relationships; Recognition
Ambition; Excellence; Brilliance; Humor; Community; Growth; Intelligence; Loyalty
Flexibility; Originality; Thankfulness; Wealth
Look at your list and group all similar values together Group them in a way that makes sense to you, personally. Create a maximum of five groupings. If you have more than five groupings, you will need to make a further choice and drop those least important.
Underline the one word in the group that is for you the most important one. Keep this to one side
Now think about your experiences. Explore them to answer the following (you might need to close your eyes to remember!) making some notes as you do:
- When have you been angry?
- When have you been most satisfied?
- What do you consider my best experience (when you performed at your peak)?
- What types of environments inspire your best work?
- What aspects of my personality are most admired by others?
- What, if I had my choice, would I never do again if I didn’t have to?
- What have been my key reasons for leaving a job?
Look at the five groups and underlined key words from STEP THREE. Do you see any connection between what you have enjoyed, disliked, succeeded in etc and the values you have identified? What might this reflection tell you about important aspects of your life, such as work, family, community or friendships? How might they affect the choices you make?
If this or other exercises have provoked some questions. To find out more about coaching CONTACT ME and we can discuss your ideas.
Please let me know how you got on or improvements you would make. See you next week!